Monday Music Discovery: Happy

Happy by Never Shout Never

I'm happy knowing that you are mine
The grass is greener on the other side
The more I think the more I wish
That we could lay here for hours and just reminisce

I slowed down.

Slowing Down

Growing up, I couldn’t wait. When in elementary school I couldn’t wait until I could attend middle school where I could switch classes and have my every own lockers. As soon as I became a 7th grader, the countdown until high school began. Once in high school, college was all I could think about. However, it wasn’t until my junior year of college that I viewed the ‘real world’ through rose colored lens and anxiously awaited the opportunity to leave my mark. I didn’t know how (still don’t) and I didn’t know where, but I was going to be somebody (whatever that means).

Fast forward 5 years and I still can’t wait. I am trying to savor these fleeting moments with Weston as a newborn but I find myself dreaming about the days to come when we have our routine down and he is sleeping through the majority of the night. Why is it so difficult for me to focus on the moment rather then putting my attention toward the future? Sure, it is a good trait to possess, being goal-oriented does have it perks, but I am jealous of those who can simply just be. That being said, I am finding that motherhood looks good on me. It suits me. I am learning.  Maybe, just maybe, this is how I am meant to make my mark on the world. When pregnant, I was worried about losing myself after becoming a mom. Instead, I think I am finding myself in motherhood.

Baby Gear Explosion

It has happened. My family room is now one of those rooms. You know, the type of room that could double as a baby equipment showroom. I find it funny that there are so many ‘must haves’ that we seem to forget that humans have been caring for babies for thousands of years; many of those years sans pack n’plays, swings, and adventure gyms.

Things are going well sans Clay, we survived the weekend. Weston and I are getting enough sleep and enjoying the wonders of daytime television. Clay’s mother arrived today for a visit (cue evil mother-in-law music…just kidding) and will stay for a couple of days. We then have visitors arriving in spurts until the Clay comes back home. I am forever grateful for the offers of help from family and friends, I honestly don’t believe I could have done it otherwise.

Look who is 2 weeks old today. Such a sweet little boy. With his first baby pimple. Nice.

 

We’ll Miss You

I can handle 3 weeks, I can handle 3 weeks, I can handle 3 weeks….

The Ugly Side of Motherhood

I write this post with Weston sleeping on my chest (thank goodness for laptops). The past 10 days have been filled with little learning moments and the realization that somebody out there will always find fault with a parenting decision we have made. What nobody tells you when you’re pregnant is that guilt can trump the feelings of love during the first week of raising your child. Nobody mentions the crying spells (due to hormones and said guilt), the constant breastfeeding schedule, or the worry that your child is not gaining enough weight. You know your priorities have changed when your two goals for the day are not to cry and take a shower.

Combing the internet for solace only leaves new mothers even more confused. Message boards, articles, and websites all proclaim advice that when put together with everything else is just a huge ball of contradiction. Some of these bits of ‘advice’ are quick to demonize those who make decisions that differ from their own. Whether this is a coping mechanism to make them feel better about their choices or to fill their need to be super mom, I’m not sure.

All I know is that as time passes, I am starting to feel more confident in my parenting abilities and feel more comfortable in my new role as mom. Besides, how can you not love waking up (in a sleep deprived state of course) to this little guy? Clay leaves tomorrow for three-week predeployment training. I keep telling myself that I can handle everything and we will be okay. I’m sure we will. I know we will.

Filled with Coffee and Love

Whew. Talk about a whirlwind week. Weston is learning to adapt to the outside world while Clay and I are learning to care for our son in a state of exhaustion and overwhelmed with love.  We brought him home from the hospital on Wednesday and our lovely nurse tech made us pose for an official ‘going home’ picture.

On our way home, we made a stop that caters to all first-time parents needs…

He is starting to open his eyes every so often and his hair is really lightening up.  Clay and I were both blonde as children (I still am…*wink).  Each grandma thinks he looks like their respective side of the family (I think he looks like a newborn baby) and he has to wear mittens due to him scratching his face. Each morning Clay and I wake up, look at each other and say, “We can’t believe he is ours.” Isn’t life full of blessings?

Our Baby

Waiting

No baby yet.  Clay and I are trying to wait as patiently as we can for baby W’s arrival.  Clothes, sheets, receiving blankets, burp cloths, etc… have all been washed multiple times.  The hospital bag, diaper bag, and camera are all ready to go. Lucy and Desi are prepped with new toys, treats, and anything else that will distract from them no longer being the center of our attention. We’re ready but apparently baby W is not. In the meantime, we will continue to wait.

Sitting, Waiting, Wishing

Jack Johnson

Wishin’ and Hopin’

Dusty Springfield

Worth a Try

I read somewhere that large amounts of pineapple can induce labor. So I thought, “Eh, worth a try.” Any excuse to eat lots of fruit salad with kiwi, mango, grapes, strawberries, mandarin oranges, and of course, pineapple is okay in my book. My mom is here, anxiously awaiting the birth of her first grandchild, my dad is in China on business, Clay’s parents are on call, and I am officially tired of being pregnant. Let’s hope I don’t go to 42 weeks. : )

Finished Nursery, I Think

If you’re anything like me, you never feel that a room is 100% complete.  At any point in time, you can find me thumbing through design magazines, strolling through HomeGoods, or surfing the web for design ideas.  It started as a child.  My parents would often just shake their heads as I moved furniture around or painted random walls.  I think I just grow tired of the same old, same old rather quickly.  My desire for change has not been diminished by adulthood, Clay will often come home from a TDY to a rearranged room or a new piece of furniture.  But, the nursery is ready (for now).